Every day in America thousands, maybe even zillions, of beers are destroyed, abandoned and deemed undrinkable. That means that excessive amounts of money are spent each year on beer that will never be enjoyed and will end up being poured down drains, into lakes and thrown into the trash. Beer is one of the most highly discriminated beverages in this country, and it is time to put a stop to it. Help American beer drinkers fight this epidemic by investing in the capacity to keep your beer colder, longer. For a nominal investment you can take a stand, make a real difference for beer. Let’s change these sad and depressing statistics, one beer at a time.
There are a number of problems facing beer, each of which are important and should not be ignored. Please do your part and share this information with your fellow warm beer haters because together we can keep cold beer cold, the way the beer Gods intended.
1. Warm, flat beer — According to our highly scientific estimations, this problem affects one in every 15 beers in America. Beers get left in the sun too long and before you know it, you are sipping on what can only be akin to cat pee. This easily preventable problem should ruin no beer, not ever.
2. Broken bottles — These accidents happen when you least expect, and often, the consequences are deadly for your beer — and maybe even your pinky toe. Shattered glass everywhere and a cold brew wasted… broken beer bottles affect all of us. You can easily prevent these injuries with a BottleKeeper — Strong enough to withstand even the drunkest drops, preventing that cold beer from becoming road kill.
3. No glass near the pool or on the boat? — Beer bottles can’t help that they are made of glass – they were born that way. Is it their fault that the tasty delight of cold suds are housed in a tall beautiful bottle? Don’t let pool rules shame your beer’s body. Avoid unnecessary beer bottle nudity and enjoy that frothy brew with your water wings.
4. Lonely beer — Beer is born, brewed and bottled as a family. It lives in families of six, 12 and sometimes 24. It is meant to live in a group, and is most comfortable surrounded by its own kind. Don’t consume beer alone and rip it from its natural habitat. Consume your beer where it will be happiest — surrounded by other beers, music, laughter and fun. BottleKeeper is perfect for all kinds of social events, and will ensure that your beer is consumed the way it was meant to be: cold.
And please, enjoy BottleKeeper responsibly!